The Crushing Grace of God

It's birthday season at our house! The twins turned nineteen last month, Andrew turned 27 last week, Audrey will be 18 next month, and then Sophia will be 22 in May and Randy will be 50 in June, which means I am not far behind! Where is time going? I blink and I haven't blogged in two years! This morning I was feeling a little sad, because I am supposed to be in Pennsylvania with Randy visiting Andrew and Vicky for his birthday and I'm not. I'm here recovering from the flu. So as I moped around the house this morning I decided to read Paul David Tripp's New Morning Mercies and he said so eloquently, "We all need to encourage one another with the theology of uncomfortable grace, because this side of eternity, God's grace often comes to us in uncomfortable forms. It may not be what you and I want, but it is precisely what we need. God is faithful; he will use the brokeness of the world that is your present address to complete the loving work of personal transformation that he has begun. Now, that's grace." I love this. It is so true. I can't go through birthday season without thinking of Matthew. Matthew would have been 24. What an absolute, loving, grace of God that He wrecked my life with the love and the loss of Matthew. So this is my encouragement to you; don't waste your suffering. God is allowing it-with knowledge, with love, with purpose, for a reason. Unfortunately, loss and suffering and hard times and my own sinfulness seem to be the context of my most precious growth and learning. So my friends if this is a season of hurt and loss and unimaginable pain take hold of the hope of Jesus Christ. He IS faithful. Someone sent me this song on February 10, It's called Flowers. It was a good reminder for me. "So I brought it up in a desperate prayer Lord, why are you keeping me here? Then He said to me Child, I'm planting seeds I'm a good God, and I have a good plan So trust that I'm holding a watering can And someday you'll see That flowers grow in the valley When I'm on the mountain and looking down below I'll see a valley of flowers that needed time to grow And I'll thank you for the rain The hurt and days of pain And I'll bring it up in a grateful prayer Thank you, Jesus, for keeping me there You know just what I need And you've planted seeds Cause you're a good God with a real good plan And you hold my world and a watering can So I can have peace. Cause flowers grow in the valley" I would have chosen a different plan. But He didn't-and I can say without a doubt He IS faithful and He IS good. Sometimes His graciuos will is to wreck our lives and crush our dreams. Yet, he has a purpose and we may not understand it fully until we reach heaven, but then we will know fully and be known fully. Oh, I can't wait to see the beautiful tapestry of lives wrecked in the loving hand and with the loving knowledge of Christ. What beautiful stories and testimonies he is writing. If you don't know the story of Matthew; it's here on the blog....look for posts in February and you'll find it!