Full Circle

Not often in life have I seen things come full circle, but this week I did.  It seems like a lifetime ago....and in a way it was...I was eighteen.....now I'm thirty-seven!  19 years ago?  Where has time gone?  In a way it seems like just yesterday.  I was a senior at a conservative, Christian, high school.  My best friend in the whole entire world, who was also a senior at the same conservative, Christian, high school, got pregnant.  My parents and her parents were very good friends too, and had been for years.  It was a year and a situation that was much bigger then us.  We were so young.  So inexperienced.  Yet this was HUGE.

She went to her senior prom pregnant.  She graduated pregnant.  She went to beach week pregnant.  She was young.  She was beautiful.  She was forever changed.  So was I.  Some showered her with grace.  Others sadly showered her with shame.  Some loved her.  Many judged her.

To make a long and painful story short, my friend made the painful choice to have her son and to place him for adoption.

My friend agonized over the selection of parents for her sweet baby.  She would pour over their books.  She wanted to make the right choice.  It was a huge choice.  Choosing who would raise your son.  She was only seventeen.  Yet she knew this choice mattered.  She took it very seriously.  There were a lot of tears.  A lot.  

I will never forget that August morning when I got a call to my dorm room saying my friend had gone into labor.  I jumped in my car and raced the 45 minutes home and stood by her side as she gave birth.  I have labored and given birth to 6 babies....but I have only witnessed one babies birth from the other end of the table.  It was his.  Life emerging into our space and time is a miracle. To behold it is a blessing and a life changing experience.  I watched that little boy slip into the world and into our hearts. I was changed that day. He was a beautiful baby.  I remember touching him and crying over him and wondering if she would ever see her baby again.  Years later when I started having my own children at that same hospital I would always think of her and over the years the enormity of her sacrifice became more and more evident to me.  She gave that sweet boy a gift and the cost was a hole in her heart.  I love her.

Well....life, and jobs, and husbands, and kids, and school, and chasing dreams happened and we stayed in touch for a while but the years have brought us apart.  Our parents are still dear friends and I have gotten updates from them over the years.  I was delighted to hear that just last week she held that baby boy again.  Yet now he is a man.  I saw a picture.  He is the spitting image of his dad.  Handsome boy.  He came to meet his birth parents.  He is 19 years old.  He told them that they could not have made a better choice.  He had a good life.  He has good parents.  They adopted another boy too so he had a brother.  Healing.  Wholeness.  My friend looked so happy.  Her son had his arm looped over her shoulder and she was reaching up and clinging to his arm.  This morning my heart soared as I saw that picture.  Thank you Lord for restoration!

God is good.  I bless the Lord for a mother's love strong enough to do what is best, not what is easiest.  I bless the Lord for picking up the ashes of a 17 year olds foolish choice, that anyone could have made, and creating a beautiful life and a beautiful family for this precious boy.  I bless the Lord for letting us see this come full circle.  It is good to see that baby boy again.  He was burned in my heart that August 19 years ago and to see him grown and healthy and happy, looking just like his daddy, it is good medicine.  Singing the praises of a good God this morning.  One who brings beauty from the ashes.